This is that time of the year where I get all sentimental. This time it is kind of difficult to even think. I got into an accident on the last day of September. I have broken my hand and few parts of my skull. When I think about things I don’t get a clear memory. It is all very cloudy. But I am alive. People say I should be thankful for that.
Usually during Octobers I tend to get extra busy. I take up on new assignments, extra respinsibilities at office just not to remember certain dates and days. This time it is gifted to me. I am lying in bed doing nothing for the entire day. But then nothing comes to my mind.
But it made me realize deep inside I don’t want to forget those certain days. The pretense of being too busy to care was just a mask. It doesn’t matter how old I get, I would never forget few dates.
Today is my sister’s birthday. It used to be fun. But then making people stay in my life is not exactly my strength. We drifted three years back. Not a day goes by without thinking about her. She had touched my life like that. Sometimes when I feel proud of myself of having crossed the hurdles and think of my goals which I had crossed in my bucket list. Turning back, I see nothing of that wouldn’t be possible without my sister. She was not family. We met in social media. But she will be my only sister.
I was in and out of consciousness when I was getting treated in the hospital. I remember the blood soaked shirt of mine. I also remember desperately searching for Prason Christopher Robin. I wanted him to deliver the news to my sister. If I was gone she should know it only through him. I thought and thought about what else I should say to people before I close my eyes. About the book I have finished and in editing stage? About the one I am writing now? Or my passwords to my family so that they know of the very limited savings I had done. But right at the brink of the other side, there was nothing else I wanted to share. Except for the love to my sister.
Few people leave such a mark in our lives. I wish I had realised all this before we drifted apart. I wish she reads this somehow. I wish we would celebrate her birthday together next year.
Happy Birthday Sinduja!! Have a great year ahead.